Feelings

As I sit down to write this piece
I'm thinking about a lot to say the least
As the tears falls, tears of sadness and rage
My dark side wants to be unleashed and uncaged

As I wanna give into the feelings of despair
Feeling that I'm all alone and no one cares
Left to fight off these feelings alone
Thinking about the things for which I must atone

I cant help but think about you
Through the darkness a ray of light shines through
Yes sometimes you cause my heart to hurt
But I'm just not ready to bury this beneath the dirt

I'm not the easiest person to be with, neither are you
But for some reason, through all the fighting, somehow love gets through
I cant give a definite answer as to why
I just know being without with you, I rather die

I wanna move on and you also, that much is damn true
But, at least to me, life just wont be worth it without you
I've made so many plans that involve you in them, it will suck if you aren't around
I'm not sure if you're gonna leave or not, but if you don't, I'm down

Down to start over. Try to regain that which bullshit has taken
It's a tough road, but if we work at it, I think we can make it
I don't know if I'm still in your heart. It hurts to think that I'm not
But if I am, I have to keep fighting and until my last breath, I wont stop

Yes, I have my days where I don't wanna fight for something I've earned
But I have to keep fighting regardless, that's something I've learned
The tears keep falling, they just wont stop.
I don't know why I'm crying, I'll just keep doing it until I drop

Drop because of fatigue or heartbreak, I hope those wont be reasons
This shit has been extra hard to go through this part of my lonely season

I have no idea why I'm so fixated on you. I plague my mind thinking about it.
It cant be because of your touch or your sex (which is bomb), it's been so long since we did it.
I cant fathom why I love you so much, It's something about you I guess.
It's something that speaks to me deeply. Something that makes you better than the rest

Something that makes me see you deeper than a best friend, deeper than a wife
Something that regardless of how you anger me, always reminds me why you're in my life
Something that I see in you and you in me. Something that needs to come out
Maybe then I will finally know and there will no longer be any doubt

Maybe something was created in us to be brought out by us.
Maybe because of that, we have all this bickering and this fuss.
Whatever it is, it cant be bad if it keeps pulling us back.
A lot of things might be missing, love is something we don't lack.

It keeps us coming back for more. The drug we swore never to be hooked on
This might be a little inappropriate but I just remembered how good you look in a thong
Love makes you do strange things. Things that you swore never to do.
I guess if 2 people leave each other only to fall all over again, their love must be true

I would love to feel that in person soon. It's been my dream for quite some time
I wish God would stop taking me through this and just let me be with you
We know that things can usually change at the drop of a dime
Since that's true God, stop saying to me, and let me see you DO.

I've tried to position myself for this, I don't know what else is left
I've been yelling and screaming to the point of me going deaf.
If You truly made me a promise, come through on it.
You say you aren't a liar, but right now I'm calling bullshit

You haven't lied to me before, so why are you doing it now?
What's wrong in her wanting to be in a wedding gown?
Walking down the aisle getting married in Your sight?
Please do something soon, I'm getting weak but still holding with all my might

If she's gone, I'm sorry for fucking up, I'll take my part of the blame
It's fucked up that something so perfect was lost. It's a damn shame
I'm done and I wanna see results as I write this final line.
It's been more than time and on this man and this woman, it's time to let the light shine